I had a rather strange phone conversation with one of my “readers” a couple days ago. If not strange it was at least different; the first of its kind. The woman said she didn’t want my materials because it was more like a workbook and she just wanted to read. I didn’t ask many questions, …
You are not trying to be bad, stubborn, passive or whatever. You are merely trying to control your feelings and your thoughts. You are doing the best you can considering the coping mechanisms you bring, your situation and a number of other factors. You don’t truly want to feel responsible for hurting someone. You don’t …
Can you think of someone who copes by being submissive, by accommodating others, sometimes by relishing the victim role? Can you think of someone who waltzes through life being seductive or charming as a way to get what s/he wants? Or some who cope with the inner anxiety and fears by controlling his/her world and …
As a male you are asked to be more romantic. If you are a typical male, this strikes a scary cord. You think of some stud, with piercing eyes and sly soft smile who knows how to wooooo a woman and “sweep her off her feet.” You are expected to say the right thing at …
Communication is king! However, here you are: tongue-tied, reluctant to say what you think or feel, yet feel that seething frustration of not being heard. You don’t know what to do. Others seem to scream at you: say more, get it out, express yourself! And, you, plain and simple, just don’t feel safe. Leave your …
8 Underlying Reasons why “Talking” may Kill a Marriage Read More »
And as you scan the media, as you encounter others at work or in other contexts, and if you look a little below the surface, you notice that getting personal needs met is a huge priority in our culture. The need for attention, the need for power, the need for success, the need for recognition, …
The marriages that struggle and endure with pain far outnumber those they observe that offer life and health to the couple. Reality indicates to you that just perhaps marriage will be difficult. It is expected, especially if you talk to other married couples, that the marriage will grow “cold.” The passion will fade. The advent …
One spouse always seemingly wants more (intimacy, talking, connection, time together, etc) than the other. There is ALWAYS an imbalance. Usually, but not always, it is the male who backs away or displays hesitancy. Please leave your comment about the video below. What is the intimacy balance like in your relationship?
I’ve observed that we live in an ADD – OCD culture. You may flit from thought to thought, project to project and for the life of you find it difficult to maintain your focus. Our medical community labels this as Attention Deficit Disorder and prescribes medication. Or you may work extremely hard controlling your environment …
When confronted with a marital crisis, your knee jerk reaction is to focus “out there” to stop the crisis. An almost obsessive like focus on your spouse or partner during a marital crisis I find extremely common, at least when the crisis first erupts. Your world is thrown into chaos. Your future suddenly is marked …
