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Mindsets that Generate Magic Moments in a Marriage: Conflict Resolution

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A couple that resolves conflict quickly and painlessly encourages Magic Moments. Not all marriages suffer from conflict. I’m talking primarily about verbal conflict. Some couples say they never “fight.” And, they don’t. They find a way to cope and manage differences without resorting to verbal assaults. I would guess that 15-25% of marriages find conflict …

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Shift #4: From Running from your Spouse to Confronting Your Spouse

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One in a marriage or relationship of emotional investment is ALWAYS (instead of confronting your spouse) running away or distancing self or putting on the brakes, at some point, with communication, intimacy, closeness and the process of knowing and being known. In 80% of the marriages you can count on this process. It’s usually men …

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Men, Intimacy and Patterns

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Part 4 (Prior post: Men, Intimacy and Isolation) Knowing the coping patterns of your spouse (as outlined in “7 Reasons Men have Difficulty Getting Close and Staying Close”) provides relief. Often you as a spouse are too close to the relationship to see the overarching patterns of coping and behavior. You see the tree staring …

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Men, Intimacy and Isolation

3 Comments / Communication in Marriage, Distant Spouse, Intimacy and the Distancing Spouse, Intimacy in Marriage, Men and Intimacy, Romance, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

Men and Intimacy – Part 3 (the prior post: Men, Intimacy and Guilt) The spouse who lives and breathes next to an emotionally distant man may experience a strong dose of isolation. If guilt and a sense of undue responsibility are present she may shrink from the world. Her world narrows, her enthusiasm for life …

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How Guilt Impacts Men and Intimacy

5 Comments / Communication in Marriage, Distant Spouse, Intimacy and the Distancing Spouse, Men and Intimacy, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

Men and Intimacy – Part 2 (the prior post: Men and Intimacy) A woman often feels a tinge guilt for the distance in the marriage. Am I not enough? What’s wrong with me that he won’t come close? Of course, we all bring with us thoughts of inadequacy into your marital bed and marital dinner …

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Intimacy in Marriage: Men and Intimacy

6 Comments / Confronting Your Spouse, Distant Spouse, Intimacy and the Distancing Spouse, Intimacy in Marriage, Marriage Crisis Coaching, Men and Intimacy, Save Your Marriage / By

Introduction: Intimacy in Marriage I recently offered a new report “7 Reasons Men have Difficulty Getting Close and Staying Close” to my readers and asked for their responses. I wanted to determine how the report was helpful; how it enabled them to gain awareness, make shifts and feel better with their spouses. I offered an …

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Seven Reasons Men Have Difficulty with Closeness in Marriage

7 Comments / Communication in Marriage, Distant Spouse, Dream Marriage, Romance, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

What difficulties do men have in creating and developing intimacy and closeness in marriage? I’m first going to outline seven reasons for men having difficulty in getting and keeping closeness in marriage. These reasons emerge from the general coping patterns I talked about earlier. 1. A man may proclaim: “It’s not me. It’s your fault.” …

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Why Men Have Difficulty with Closeness

Leave a Comment / Distant Spouse, Dream Marriage, Intimacy and the Distancing Spouse, Intimacy in Marriage, Men and Intimacy, Romance, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

What is it that creates men to have difficulty with closeness? And, how does it make you feel? Please understand that this is not about man bashing. I’m a man and I prefer not to be bashed. And women, I assume also don’t like to be bashed. We have enough bashing in our culture. The …

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The Underlying Relationship Meaning of “I Love you but am not ‘in love’ with You”

5 Comments / Communication in Marriage, Distant Spouse, Falling Out of Love, Intimacy and the Distancing Spouse, Marriage Crisis Keys, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

So, what exactly is the underlying relationship meaning of “I love you but am not in love with you”? And how do you respond when your partner tells you that? This is part 3 of a seven part blog series on the underlying relationship meaning of the words, “I love you but am not in …

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When to Divorce: What’s Love Got to Do with It?

13 Comments / Communication in Marriage, Confronting Your Spouse, Distant Spouse, Falling Out of Love, Save Your Marriage, Uncategorized / By

Should you really start thinking about when to divorce when your partner says that he or she has “fallen out of love” with you? This is the second part in my series of blog posts on the commonly used phrase  “I love you but am not in love with You,” which will focus on what …

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