The Reality of Magic Moments in a Marriage What are you looking for or what do you expect in your marriage? Here’s my educated guess, after having talked to literally thousands over the decades about their primary relationship: You want Magic Moments. Here are some examples of a Magic Moment: You look into each other’s …
Part 6 (previous post: Men, Intimacy and Judgment) You want to believe you are “normal.” Often, in the midst of a marital crisis you feel anything but normal. Your world is turned upside down. Your dreams and hopes of a “normal” happy family are dashed. You begin to doubt yourself. Your neediness becomes more desperate. …
Men and Intimacy – Part 3 (the prior post: Men, Intimacy and Guilt) The spouse who lives and breathes next to an emotionally distant man may experience a strong dose of isolation. If guilt and a sense of undue responsibility are present she may shrink from the world. Her world narrows, her enthusiasm for life …
Part 5 (Prior post: Men, Intimacy and Patterns) Judgment generates trouble in a marital relationship. You may have a strong need to view yourself as right and your spouse as wrong. You judge his behavior and thoughts as being either acceptable or unacceptable. There may be a little grey area. Of course you do the …
Men and Intimacy – Part 2 (the prior post: Men and Intimacy) A woman often feels a tinge guilt for the distance in the marriage. Am I not enough? What’s wrong with me that he won’t come close? Of course, we all bring with us thoughts of inadequacy into your marital bed and marital dinner …
What difficulties do men have in creating and developing intimacy and closeness in marriage? I’m first going to outline seven reasons for men having difficulty in getting and keeping closeness in marriage. These reasons emerge from the general coping patterns I talked about earlier. 1. A man may proclaim: “It’s not me. It’s your fault.” …
Seven Reasons Men Have Difficulty with Closeness in Marriage Read More »
So, what exactly is the underlying relationship meaning of “I love you but am not in love with you”? And how do you respond when your partner tells you that? This is part 3 of a seven part blog series on the underlying relationship meaning of the words, “I love you but am not in …
The Underlying Relationship Meaning of “I Love you but am not ‘in love’ with You” Read More »
Should you really start thinking about when to divorce when your partner says that he or she has “fallen out of love” with you? This is the second part in my series of blog posts on the commonly used phrase “I love you but am not in love with You,” which will focus on what …
So, you ask, how can you possibly help me fix my relationship? How do you do more than swallow hard and go into shock when your spouse says, “I love you but am not in love with you anymore?” I will present distinctions and what your confused spouse might REALLY be saying to you,which is …
What are the real reasons you have for saving the marriage? When I ask a spouse why he or she wants to save the marriage, I often hear, “Because I love him or her.” And I sometimes respond, “What is it about him or her that you love?” or, “What do you mean that you …
Saving the Marriage: Why Do you Love Your Spouse? Read More »
